With the new year coming, we deiced to compile some dumb things that EVO staff members have done; that way, you don’t have to! Read on for valuable insight and life hacks. 

  •  Don’t eat brats with no buns until 3 am and then leave for an alpine start.


  • Don’t try to steal a street sign by climbing on top of a newsstand; the newsstand may be wobbly, and the street sign will definitely be secured.


  • Don’t be on first name basis with the ER – or set yourself on fire. Rubber cement does not act as a fire retardant.


  • Don’t lead the Bastille with quickdraws. You’ll get the rope stuck.


  • Don’t top out on the Naked Edge in the dark without a headlamp. 


  • Don’t try to cut the peel off a frozen banana.


  • Don’t have your friend’s first time soloing the 2nd flatiron be in the dark, in hiking boots. Yolo solo in the daytime with mocs.


  • If you’re going to let your friend pick you up, upside-down, and do a simul-cartwheel together, wear a helmet. Better yet, be the one doing the picking up.


  • Don’t climb with a knife in your pocket. It could stab your second. To avoid this, don’t climb with a knife in your pocket. 


  • Don’t let your car battery die at the crag. A string of stoppers will work, but is highly un-recommended.
Recommended Posts

Leave a Comment